Annoying things people do at airports: a non-exhaustive list

annoying things people do at airports

I love travel almost as much as I hate people. And those two things collide in a spectacular fashion at the airport, because people are at their most annoying when they’re flying. Here is a non-exhaustive list of annoying things people do at airports and when flying. Because there isn’t enough time in the world to compile a complete list.

  • Holding up the security line by not taking off their belt and having to go back and put it through the machine.
  • Not taking their laptop out of their bag, so that all x-ray machine function is halted for 10 minutes while they investigate.
  • Not pushing the bins down the conveyor belt when they’re getting ready to go through security so that no one else can prepare their bins.
  • Not moving out of the way to repack their stuff on the other side of the security line so that other people can’t get to their stuff.
  • Blocking the moving walkway with their luggage when people are running behind them to catch a flight.
  • Arguing about how much liquid you’re allowed to take on board. If you bought a giant bottle of cologne through security, that’s your bad.
  • Letting their kids play the piano in the terminal as though they’re not bothering an entire terminal full of people.
  • Actually when parents let their kids do anything except sit quietly with an iPad. The rest of us are tired, and this is not a daycare.
  • Standing in line to board when there’s no indication that the flight is boarding. Then there’s a 200-foot line of people standing around for 45 minutes for no fucking reason.
  • Not paying attention when you’re called to the front of the line. Any line. Check in, immigration, security. Everyone at an airport has somewhere to be, so pay attention.
  • Sitting next to the only outlet and not even bothering to use it.
  • Using up 6 outlets to charge every electronic device they’ve ever owned.
  • Hogging precious seat space so their coat and laptop bag have somewhere to sit.
  • Repacking their entire bag at check-in. Do that at home.
  • Having loud conversations in person or on the phone. Especially when people are trying to sleep at 2 am.
  • Pushing past everyone to the front of baggage claim. It’s not a Beatles concert. No one else wants your ratty roller board; you’ll get it.
  • Crowding the gate even when they know they’re going to be the last group to be called. It doesn’t get them on the plane any faster, but it does create a clusterfuck of people.
  • Stopping to patiently remove your jacket and get a book from your overhead bag when there are 150 people behind you waiting to board.
  • Taking up overhead space with their big ass jacket.
  • Smelling bad. Sorry, I know this is sometimes a cultural difference, but when you’re going to share the recycled air of a plane with a bunch of people, take a shower.
  • Crowding other people when you sit (men, looking at you). Seats are cramped enough without your knees taking up a third of the space in front of me.
  • Making a big show of switching seats so you can sit next to whoever for a 45 minute flight.
  • Shoving their heavy bag on top of whatever else is in the overhead bins.
  • Keeping their seat reclined during the meal service.
  • Putting their feet on other people’s armrests. Gross, rude, and savage. Learn some manners.
  • Talking to someone who is reading or has headphones on. That’s the international sign for: leave me the fuck alone.
  • Last but not least… Not respecting lines. If you skip people in line, you are the worst kind of person.