On my crusade to celebrate my favorite holiday, I ventured out once again in Prague in search of a real Halloween party. And luckily, this time I found it.
From my experience last year, I knew most people wouldn’t wear a costume, and if they did anything, it would be put on some sloppy ghoul makeup. And if I was going to do the same thing, I was going to do it better. So I spent 2 hours putting on my face for my angel of death getup. And I think I fucking brought it. This might be one of my best costumes ever. The downside is that I stuck out like a spooky sore thumb everywhere I went.
The walk of shame (if you have any)
Let me tell you what it feels like to be one of the only people in costume on a Saturday night in Prague. When I was leaving my apartment building, a mother and her son were coming inside and basically had a heart attack when they saw me. She quickly realized I was in costume and started speaking to me in Czech. I didn’t understand anything except “well done.” The second I left the building the people smoking outside of the bar downstairs all turned their heads. And I could only make out the word Halloween as I walked past them.
Public transportation is the worst. Imagine being on a quiet tram with 40-50 people who are all pretending not to stare at you. The second you make eye contact, they look away. But you can feel their eyes on you the entire ride. It wasn’t until I got to a metro station that I saw two other people in sugar skull makeup. We smiled and nodded at each other as we passed. And then I was on my own again for the duration of my train ride.
On the street, people in scarves and coats glance in fear, disbelief, and sometimes delight. A couple of cars pulled over to get a good look while I waited to cross the street. Whenever a mother excitedly pointed me out to her children, I knew the seed of Halloween would be planted. And it’s my hope in looking totally ridiculous in public that the seed grows for Czech kids into a fervent love of Halloween. Because let’s face it, I’m not going to make Halloween happen here by writing about it. I have to lead by example.
I’ve been to TGI Friday’s exactly twice in the past decade and it’s because my ridiculous friend likes to do this on Halloween before we go out. If you ever walk into a family restaurant dressed as the angel of death, entire tables turn to look at you and you will feel like you’re in a David Lynch movie. Even the waitress apologized and said she was scared to look at me.
Where to find Halloween in Prague
Last year, we attempted to bar hop in places that had advertised free Halloween events. But most of these featured costumed bartenders, some pumpkin decorations, and a lot of regular ass club goers. It was disappointing, because the best part of Halloween is seeing other people’s costumes.
So this year, we decided to go to one of these over-the-top club parties for Halloween. Originally we were going to go to Bloody Sexy Halloween at Forum Karlin, which is arguably the biggest one. But the tickets for that were $20. So we decided to go to SaSaZu’s Halloween party instead, which was half the price. Word to the wise, buy your ticket online in advance because at the door they’re also $20. And we got a discount since we were in costume.
I would never normally recommend these parties to anybody, because they’re crowded and overpriced. And the second we walked in and saw the massive and empty dance floor in front of the stage, I started to have buyer’s remorse. But that’s because people in Prague party late. We got some drinks and walked around, and even though everyone was just idling by the bar, at least there were fun costumes to look at.
Eventually my friend and I went on the dance floor, because I’m old, so I didn’t have time for that place to get bumping. And clearly we have no shame. And little by little, it started filling up around us. The music got louder and the lights started flashing, and robots on stilts started coming out and it ended up being a really fantastic party.
See, I forget how amazing it is to go out in Prague where no one gropes you or tries to dance with you by humping your ass. We met some wonderful people in creative costumes from everywhere in Europe and even one guy from Madagascar who did a spontaneous dance-off with me before fist bumping and walking away. Even if I hadn’t been surrounded by people actually celebrating Halloween, it would still be one of the most fun nights I’ve ever had out.
We danced with these two Czech guys all night and the only time we ever made any physical contact was when one of them asked me if I wanted to get up on his shoulders. I haven’t done that since the last time the Florida Gators won a championship. But I was feeling festive and I trust Czechs with my life, so I knew he wouldn’t drop me. And in that beautiful moment the angel of death floated above Prague’s raucous Halloween crowd.